Four months it's already been. I'm loving it but I feel like by this point I would have changed more than I seem to realize. Maybe I just can't see it yet. I'm learning so much and seeing beautiful things, but I can't tell what is evolving about myself. I'm sure my perspective is, but I wish I could "feel" it processing, rather than feeling dissatisfied like I'm constantly trying to make the most of everything.
The recurring dreams about this year being already over don't cease. Woke up crying the other day because of it. I hope that I can just get over that fear and start "living" more rather than once again building up my expectations for how it'll shape me.
Right now just trying to get through tasks but it's hard to stop and think about how fast the time is going by when you just take challenges as a step my step process. Every day goes by so quickly and the cycle just repeats...
Things are due in for a change soon, though I'm not sure how. I'm happy and enjoying life. Hope that the stresses diminish in the time to come and I'll feel more liberated. Need to start documenting more photos as well, speaking of which I can't believe I haven't developed my film yet. Though it's of course ideal to live in the moment, I need some way of carrying my memories with me, right?
Well, that's all for now.
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